Decoding his mixed signals

Photo by Gabrielle Lutze via Stocksy
Photo by Gabrielle Lutze via Stocksy

How many times have you personally tried to read your guy’s messages and instantly felt confused? Probably a million times, do we ever actually know what a guy is trying to say or are we insistent on trying to decipher the messages they are giving us?

When it comes to guys, sometimes they are just oblivious and don’t even realize they are sending mixed messages. Sometimes they are simply just busy and don’t have the time to text you back for a few hours, days, weeks, even months (if you are still waiting after a few weeks I think you need to re-evaluate the situation and realize he is not coming back). What I have learned is stop over-analyzing every message he sends you, before answering him back right away wait before you send something you may regret whether it is confronting him on why he hasn’t answered you back or accusing him of something he may not have done.

You both want different things. As much as we’d like for people to be more transparent, it doesn’t always work that way and he could just simply be testing the watersNot every relationship will be like the fairytale romance in the movies, sometimes things get complicated and people grow apart. Not every guy is into being in a relationship, what I have come to realize is in college/university it is more about going with the flow, having a good time and not worrying about being tied down. That is totally okay but don’t jump into something without knowing where you stand. If he starts to become distant, sometimes its a red flag that he simply isn’t ready for something big to happen yet.

Put yourself in his shoes. Sometimes we are the ones who are oblivious to the situation and we truly don’t understand what he may be going through. If we see things from a different perspective, it may help us to recognize what is really going on. Men and women have a lot of differences but we also have a lot of similarities so just imagine yourself in his situation and try to understand why he may be sending you those mixed signals. I have learned that sometimes the best thing to do is give him time to work through his issues, and if you are meant for each other he will come back to you when he is more stable.

Be there for him. Just sending him a quick message acknowledging that you are there for him can make a difference in his life knowing that he has someone to count on even if he doesn’t realize it. Most of the time when guys are busy or upset they will often shelter themselves from everyone and hardly respond to texts or social media for that matter. An easy fix may also be just giving him space, this will also help you decide what you want, and give him clarity knowing someone is still there for him no matter what.

Communication is key. This does not mean blowing up his phone when he doesn’t text back. Mixed signals can only be cleared up by getting to the bottom of what’s going on. Talking to the guy and figuring out what his motives are will be the best way to clear up any issues with mixed signals. Communication is the best way to have a successful relationship, so it never hurts to start early.

These are simply suggestions on what have helped me in my search for love, hopefully you find them useful as well. Remember this, we are not perfect, we will make mistakes but in the end we will learn from them to become a better person.




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